A nostalgic Malayalam track, a romantic rewind, and a flood of heart emojis — that is how the viral “Kilichundan Mambazhame” trend first appeared on social media. Couples recreated their journey from present-day marriages back to the grainy, low-resolution photos of when they first met, often set to the sentimental rhythm of the song.
What seemed like innocent nostalgia soon took a troubling turn.
As more videos surfaced, viewers began noticing a disturbing pattern: several reels featured 15- and 16-year-old girls in romantic relationships with adult men, often with significant age gaps. What was packaged as “true love” raised serious questions about whether these relationships were actually cases of grooming.
Many commenters flagged potential violations under the Protection of Children from Sexual Offences Act (POCSO Act), which criminalises sexual offences against minors. The backlash was swift, and numerous videos were deleted following public outrage.
A 15-Second Reel, A Legal Risk
To casual viewers, these videos appeared to celebrate loyalty and long-lasting romance. But to legal experts and child rights activists, they resembled something far more alarming.
Retired police sub-inspector Kuttikrishnan remarked that even a short social media reel could potentially serve as digital evidence. While the POCSO Act does not explicitly define “grooming,” it criminalises behaviours that amount to sexual exploitation or abuse of minors.
Additionally, the Bharatiya Nyaya Sanhita (BNS) 2023 includes provisions covering stalking, online luring, enticing minors, and exploitation — reinforcing the seriousness of such conduct in the digital age.
Recent court cases underscore how grooming often precedes abuse. In one instance, a 25-year-old man was sentenced to 20 years under POCSO for repeatedly assaulting a 15-year-old girl. In another case, a 20-year-old man received a 63-year sentence for sexually assaulting a 14-year-old after luring her into an abandoned building.
In 2025 alone, more than 4,600 POCSO cases were reportedly registered in Kerala, with legal experts noting that many involve grooming patterns.
What Is Grooming?
Grooming is a calculated process of manipulation. An adult gradually builds emotional trust with a minor — often positioning themselves as a protector, mentor, or confidant. Initially, there may be no physical contact. Instead, the focus is on emotional dependency and psychological control.
Over time, the minor may begin to believe the relationship is voluntary or initiated by them. Experts explain that this illusion of choice is part of the manipulation.
Clinical psychologists stress that adolescents lack the cognitive maturity required to give informed consent. The prefrontal cortex — the brain region responsible for judgment and impulse control — continues developing well into early adulthood. This makes teenagers especially vulnerable to validation-seeking and emotional influence.
Why Is It Being Normalised?
Despite high literacy rates, some communities continue to romanticise relationships that began when one partner was a minor. Experts argue that such narratives often prioritise the comfort of “loyalty stories” over the uncomfortable truth of exploitation.
Social media further amplifies survivor bias. Viewers see only the marriages that lasted — not the thousands of minors who were exploited, silenced, or traumatised.
Psychiatrists warn that sanitised online portrayals may mislead teenagers into believing that relationships with older adults guarantee security and stability. In reality, grooming often follows a predictable pattern: trust-building, isolation, emotional control, and eventual abuse.
Senior mental health professionals caution against labelling every viral video as abuse. However, they acknowledge that grooming is a widespread reality. Adolescents in transitional life stages are particularly susceptible to adults who present themselves as understanding or liberating figures.
Importantly, experts emphasise that responsibility always lies with the adult. Even if a teenager expresses interest, the adult must refuse. Minors cannot legally or psychologically consent to such relationships.
A Broader Social Concern
Globally, violence and abuse against children remain significant concerns. Grooming can occur in homes, schools, communities, gaming platforms, and social media spaces. Studies indicate that childhood sexual abuse can alter neural pathways, affecting cognition, emotional regulation, and long-term mental health.
Compounding the trauma is societal victim-blaming. Survivors are often questioned about their choices, which can lead to internalised guilt and prolonged psychological harm.
The “Kilichundan Mambazhame” trend may eventually fade from timelines. However, experts argue that the underlying issue — the romanticisation of adult-minor relationships — demands sustained awareness. Concepts such as consent, digital hygiene, manipulation, and exploitation must be taught early to children and reinforced within families.
Because behind the sweet nostalgia of a viral reel may lie a far more bitter reality.
